Jumat, 23 April 2010

Here and There

People amazingly have complete different reactions/opinions toward a same single situation/thing.

Here, the southern hemisphere particularly in a little place I call my hometown, is where I was born, I grew up and live at the moment. There, is another hemisphere. A place that I once lived and still have its influence in my life. Especially for the fact that I am in touch with some friends. So, this is how it goes, from my friends here and my friends there. Spot the difference.
  • Situation (S) : I phonecall my friend, "I am drunk,"
My friend here (H) : "Oh my God. You little alcoholic snot! Repent. Don't let anybody rape you!"
My friend there (T) : "Ha-ha. Have fun! Cool party huh? Have a great time! Enjoy!"
  • S : I wrote an email saying that I'm having a holiday in Spain.
H : "You're so lucky. Traveling all the time huh? No wonder you're still single. Don't you think about savings for your future? Or you have a super rich Dad? Well, just take care of yourself. Don't forget to bring souvenirs,"
T : "Oh good. Have you tried paella? Don't try gazpacho. It's just a cold tomato soup with a Spanish name. Do you plan to visit Alhambra? Send me postcards from there!"
  • S : My ex boyfriend visits me after we split up. We intend to go to a certain place in order to sort out our past and be good friends. Knowing this, my Dad asks my brother to accompany me. I agree but later on send my brother back home because I want to talk with my ex in private. My Dad gets very upset upon this and asks me to go home immediately.
H : "Your Dad only wants to take care of you. He wants to protect you, it's his responsibility. He loves you. Don't just see from your point of view. Think what he feels if something happens to you,"
T : "Gosh. That's insane. You're 28! Tell him you have a right to decide for yourself,"
  • S : A friend arranged a date for me with someone she knew. He turned out to be completely boring and unattractive. I flied from the place at once, saying that I have an urgent 'woman issue'.
H : "(angrily) If you don't want to be his date, at least be a good host. Give him clear signal that you're not interested, he will understand. But accompany him until you finish eating. It's impolite to suddenly left him.You're arrogant. He doesn't ask you to marry yet, does he? You're not a hundred percent sure that he's also attracted to you, are you? Why don't you just hang on for a while and look civilised?"
T : "That's my girl. Don't let him think he'll get a good night kiss or even a chance to drive you home. Get a taxi to a local bar and hang out with cool dudes only,"
  • S : A friend of mine got pregnant with her ex boyfriend, who is with another girl now.
H : "Oh No. Tell him he has to marry her. He has to take his responsibility and leave his girlfriend now,"
T : "Don't tell him anything. She doesn't want him to get his custody, does she?"
  • I complained that my Dad doesn't support me to travel.
H : " You're ungrateful. You're lucky enough that he let you travel once. I think now it's time for you to think about your future: climb on your career ladder, have a settled life, have a good job and take care of your family rather than just thinking about your own needs all the time,"
T : "Well, if you know what you want, go get it. With or without support. Your Dad will understand eventually,"
  • About being a friend
H : "Why don't you reply messages? Why don't you tell your friend you're here? Why you don't come to visit sometimes?"
T : "It's good to have friends but you need a space for yourself,"
  • I'll add this list when I remember more. As a note, I don't go for either opinions. But as someone who stay in between and try to respect everyone, sometimes, this can be quite tricky. In the end I have to pick a side. Most of the time, I go to the third choice : never ask opinion. I can be a good friend without telling them my problems.

1 komentar:

Kwee mengatakan...

How about the fourth choice:
-see it carefully whether you actually need someone else opinion and when you don't, sometime you only need to stay silent and hear what He speak.
-choose carefully to whom you'd like to get the opinion from. Remember you can't expect to get the grape fruit from mango tree.
(source: b i b b l e)

Regards,
Ur sister.